3/16/10: Online Dating Profile

Dear Dick Wolf:

So, the guys I do radio with keep threatening to write an online dating profile for me since..you know…my eggs are drying up. Well, one of our favorite listeners, @aboynamedart, weighed in on what it should entail:

In the online dating system, relationship-based offenses are particularly heinous. In Los Angeles, the dedicated women who try to avoid these vicious failures are members of an elite squad known as the Serial Dating Unit. These are Gina’s stories.

Now, if only we can get Steven Zirnkilton to voice it. Can you help out with that? My next relationship may depend on it.

Thank you. Amen.

Published in: on March 16, 2010 at 11:19 pm  Comments (1)  
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7/16/08: To Freeze or Not To Freeze

I watched the SVU episode last night called “Inconceivable” (good one, writers) in which Janine Turner and her whacked-out husband steal a cryotank of frozen embryos from a fertility clinic as a publicity stunt, with the intention of returning them safely. However, the embryos aren’t returned to the lab in time and they all die. And unfortunately, for some of the women whose eggs were in that tank, it was their last chance at having children…Well, it got me thinking. I’m 27-38 years old, with no potential husband in sight – unless you count Sam Rockwell, but I need to get his attention first which, you know, I could do if I WERE ON LAW & ORDER!!! (cue dead horse beating) So, the gigantic, looming question is – has the time come for me to get my eggs frozen?

I went through this dilemma a couple of years ago. I read an article claiming that those of us in the “Bridget Jones Generation” should be freezing our eggs before it’s too late. Before we look back and realize that our best childbearing years have gone the way of the phone booth. This way, once we get around to having kids, we don’t have to fertilize our dried-up dinosaur eggs the old-fashioned way and risk having three-headed mutant offspring. Instead, we can have our still-old-but-usable eggs fertilized in a lab and implanted back into us, the way nature intended.


Published in: on July 16, 2008 at 10:39 pm  Leave a Comment  
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