7/14/08: ROBBED!

Hmmpf. I guess I should Google Law & Order more often. I wouldn’t be the last to learn these things:

“Law & Order: SVU” Hires New DA

Dick Wolf’s trio of “Law & Order” shows are well-known for their ever-rotating cast changes. And this season will be no different on “Law & Order: Special Victims Unit,” as actress Michaela McManus joins the cast.

The actress will play the show’s newest assistant district attorney…She replaces Diane Neal, whose character was forced out in the season finale due to inappropriate actions…

Blah, blah, blah, yada, yada, yada…


Dear Dick Wolf:

DID I MISS MY AUDITION?! But I have my headshot/resume all ready to go! I even shellacked it for you, so you don’t accidentally spill coffee on it or something. How did this happen?? I do not know this McManus woman. I’ve never seen One Tree Hill. Watching your show leaves me limited time to view much else. I do, however, know that you and Mr. Fontana are good buds and a lot of the actors from his show Oz have wound up working in Law & Order land. I can only wonder if having the same last name as Emerald City’s administrator Tim McManus scored this actress a few brownie points. A less direct connection, I realize – but a connection nonetheless.

If that’s the case, I would gladly entertain the idea of changing my last name as a gesture of support for the Wolf/Fontana bond. Here are a few of the Oz related options I’ve come up with:

  • Gina Fontana (duh)
  • Gina Beecher
  • Gina O’Reily (on one hand, it’s Irish and I have red hair…on the other hand – Bill {shudder}…I know it’s spelled differently, but still…)
  • Gina K. Simmons
  • Gina Keller

As you can imagine, that last one is my personal fave, since it’s the name of Christopher Meloni’s character. Also, the surname on my birth certificate is Kenner, so it’s not that far off. Practically destiny, if you ask me.

Please let me know if making any of the aforementioned changes will help secure my spot on Law & Order. It’s a sacrifice, but I’d do it for you.

Look, I know you’ve made this (hopefully temporary) casting decision and I will respect that. However, if this McManus chick gives you any grief, I’m here for you. Besides, I reeeally think you need a redhead on this show. And I have a red head. Not to mention that I’m a complete joy to work with – ask anyone! Well, except that young tech guy from our play who tried to tell me that pretending my character doesn’t see a prop on stage when I obviously do see it, is  – quote – “what acting is all about.” Ummmm…no. Sorry dude. Not even close. Oh, and do you hear that? Yeah, that’s Uta Hagen turning over in her grave. Better apologize.

Aside from that, like I said – a complete joy.

Thank you. Happy Monday. Amen.

Published in: on July 14, 2008 at 8:19 am  Comments (2)  

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2 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. No! It just can’t be true!

    I vote for Gina Fontana. Nice stage-name sound and it goes straight for the ball-of-confusion, how-do-I-know-this-woman, somebody-get-her-in-here thing.

  2. Well, thank goodness MsManus is so beautiful – it should make catching those criminals that much easier! :rollseyes:

    Hey- I vote for you, Gina, because even when using just your voice in film- you’re hysterical!

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