7/1/08: “Range”

Dear Dick Wolf:

I’ve been waiting with bated breath for the first review of our play to come out. I was told that someone from L.A. Weekly was in the audience Saturday night. So, I log on to their website today…and there it is – woo-hoo! I’m reading, reading, frowning, reading, snarling, reading some more and then finally, it pops out and hits me like a can of beer between the eyes:

 “…neither Yates nor the markedly lovely Van Beest exhibit much range.”

Hu-?! Wha-?! Bu-?! No range?! ME?! The human mood swing?! Not only that, but I don’t even get a “markedly lovely” plug?? I’m lovely, dammit! AND I have range! Just look:


Ferocious!


Coy!


Shocked!


Pensive!


Contemptuous!


Happy!

And finally:


Dead! 

It’s cool, I’m going to cut Madame Critic (a.k.a. Deborah Klugman) some slack on this. After all, she’s entitled to her opinion. I’m sure she has no idea that I was a last-minute replacement. That I had less than three weeks with the script. That trying to memorize 70 pages worth of dialogue, do ample research and create 36 years worth of character back story, that working a full-time job Monday-Friday, a part-time job on the weekends, running to the thrift stores for costume pieces on my lunch breaks, rehearsing frantically, AND trying to spend a few moments entertaining my incredibly high-maintenance cat (who, incidentally, believes herself to be an orphan these days) left me very little time to even sleep, let alone turn in a brilliant performance opening weekend. Really, it’s not Ms. Klugman’s fault. She didn’t know. She’s just doing her job. Next time I will try harder not to bore her. I will try harder to show “range.” I’ll laugh more, I’ll cry more, I’ll brood more, I’ll be more vulnerable, more intimidating, more charming. And maybe, just maybe, I’ll work in a little dance number, like Christopher Walken always does. Yeah! That should help.
 
Honestly, sarcasm aside…I appreciate her input. It’s comments like these that make actors work that much harder. Even when we feel like we’ve poured our soul into a role, we reach down deep and find that we still have more to give.

Which means that you, Mr. Wolf, will see a damn fine performance when you come. So, let me know when I can pencil you in.

Thank you. Amen.

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Published in: on July 1, 2008 at 11:53 pm  Leave a Comment  
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